to explain my earlier post

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'cause well...everyone was rather nice about me being a bitch and this is the least I can do.

I don't like this punishment. It's not that I don't think I did anything wrong, I knew I was drinking illegally when I chose to do so. But I don't like being confined to grounds.

I've only been here a little over a week and I've only been off campus twice, once to get a dress for the semiformal and then the semi-formal itself, both on the same day. But to have that freedom...I haven't had that in so long.

Before I came here, my mom basically locked me in the house. I had the entire house to myself most of the day and never any visitors. Occassionally she'd drive me to my dad's house where I could be locked in there. They weren't trying to be cruel or mean, they just didn't want me hurt. But it may as well have been a prison sentence to solitary with daytime TV.

This feels the same way and I hate it. Yeah, it's only a week and no, I don't have plans to go anywhere, but that isn't the point really. I wouldn't mind some other form of punishment...but this just hurts.

so yeah. not asking it to be changed either, just trying to explain why I'm prolly not going to the be the most pleasant in the next week or so.

fuck-tastic.

Comments

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Well, there's a lot to do around here other than daytime TV. "Restricted to campus" just means "you have the run of a gigantic mansion with enough DVDs and video games to be its own Blockbuster, plus what seems like half the county in grounds."

I know the feeling, though. Three years pretty much stuck on the farm except for the occasional errand once I got my license and mostly had my power under control most of the time. Cows all sort of start to look the same after a while.

Hey, do you know how to ride horses? Because they have them here. And if you don't, wanna learn? It'd be something to do.

And then you can help me haul Kitty out to the stables too, I keep saying I want to take her riding and she keeps finding ways to distract me from actually doing it. ;)

If you must be depressed and angry...

[x-empath.livejournal.com]

~translated from the Castillian Spanish~

do you think you could do it away from me?

I have enough problems dealing with how _I_ feel. I don't want to feel what you feel. I don't _like_ your feelings. Your feelings suck. And if you insist on moping and swearing, I can insure, for your sanity and _mine_, that you _like_ your current predicament.

After all, I like being happy. It's so rare for me. I've had my fill of depression and anger. If I wanted to be angry, I'd invite the groundskeeper up for siesta.

~translated from the Castillian Spanish~

MdlR